Morning Brew 29/7/2020

Morning Brew 29/7/2020. 

I haven’t written a morning brew chat for 6 months! I could have sworn it was just a few weeks ago. Time is loopy these days. Well, here I am, and I have tea and Weetabix. Hello.

The rain has finally stopped in this, the most autumnal July we’ve had for a while. Yesterday was a ‘balmy’ 14°C here in the UK, whilst my family in Europe melt in 40°C heat. But today is hopeful, yet still chilly for the end of July. The sun peaks over the valley side and flowers spread their leaves to the sky in gratitude.

They say it is the coldest July since 2012. I look back at my biotime diary and last year was in the 30’s, compared with today’s 13°C. But we keep on keeping on, as they say. It could be summer by lunchtime.

There’s a slow lull about recent days. Holidays are cancelled. There are no deadlines on the near horizon. I need a push, some form of momentum, something to get rolling along. I sip my Yorkshire Tea and look around at the garden, blooming quietly.

Trains honk at each other across the valley where work is being done on the tracks. I love watching them wind their way along the hillside, hiding and emerging from trees, eventually crossing the viaduct in the distance before pulling into the small station in the next village along. The sun is sidling away behind a bank of cloud, hoping I don’t notice. A cool breeze blows through open doors. The washing machine cranks up to max volume and rattles the house to the core.

I feel like I’ve run out of steam from a few days ago. Like I was finally figuring some part of me out, but the day after, it had almost disappeared.

I notice a pattern, though. A decision, then a stop, an absolute stillness. Then action. It has happened before, and I think it’s happening now. Is it a sort of psyching-up for change, but on an unconscious level? I’m not sure, but it feels familiar. It’s as though my body and mind are mulling it over, keeping me stopped whilst they figure out the best way forward. Then a release and I can spring into that next step. It’s just a shame the best way to still me is to fill me with apathy and biscuits.

I refill my mug with even more tea. It feels like a 2-tea start to the day. Afterwards, I’ll grab my shoes and force myself out of the house, hoping to get to the end of the road before I realise what’s happening. The sun has well and truly disappeared and the optimistic blue of the sky is fading into standard ‘UK Grey’, but today calls for the beat of footsteps and a need to be up a hill. So onward, into the day.

Last morning brew here


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